It's true. In a month, give or take a few days, I'll be making the grand move back to Austin, this time on less shaky terms than I did last time, and with a much firmer grip on the idea of being an adult. When I last lived in Austin, it wasn't necessarily a terrible experience, I just burned a lot of bridges, but I also think that time in my life was one of the most.. forming. Molding. It really showed me what it meant to survive, sometimes solely on your wits sometimes.
And I pray to God I never have to see that side of myself again.
But that's another story for another time.
My buddy Matt, who over the years has actually become one of my closest friends, knows my whole "stuck in a town where I can't move forward" scenario, and he's actually being cool enough to allow me to crash at his place until I find a more permanent arrangement. He's a pegasus among the horses, and I can't thank him enough.
My plan, once I hit town, is to hit as many restaurants as possible and find a good waiting job. Granted, I'm still looking at 1-3 weeks with zero pay, since waiters don't get shit beyond attitude the first couple of weeks, so I'll make sure and work my ass off the next month to be cool for a few.
*sigh*
This isn't my most well-written blog ever, by far, and I think that's mostly because I'm nervous.
No, not nervous.
Scared as hell.
Like I mentioned, I didn't leave ol' atx on a cloud of happy last time. That's not to say I'm worried old things would come back; trust when I say, they got dealt with. I just don't want the environment, the "laid back" lifestyle I'll be surrounded by, to turn me into a 25 year old again. I like the me I am, and that isn't him.
On the love front, no new ideas that aren't completely unattainable. One who feels sorta perfect, but he's stuck in an even smaller town than me in the total opposite direction of Austin. but I really like that one. One is in Dallas, and since that's off the plate, that's not terribly realistic. The other dude's in austin, which is good, but I'm not back yet; how much chatting can you do til you or he or both just get bored and just moves on with life? I'm also stalling in terms of my heart. It's locked in it's own little cage in someways still, but every day the walls come down a little more, I think.
So if you're reading, which is highly doubtful as this is only #2, do a guy a favor and send a happy thought, a prayer, a good vibe in whatever fashion you see fit, my way? It'd be much and kindly appreciated.
oh, the approximate move day is may 4th. May the 4th be with me. yeah, I did it for the joke. boom.
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